It's been a while. Not for lack of writing fodder, simply a lack of uninterrupted quiet time. Fortunately a bit of insomnia is helping me out tonight. Its probably my body has now been trained to only get 3 hours of sleep a night, so since I've already slept that much - time to get up.
What to write about? Our van breaking down in Madison & then our truck breaking down the very next day in Mt Horeb and our fantastic friends who rescued us. Truck has been sold & replaced. That was fun. Van has been fixed at a 1/3 of dealers quote.
Our great misadventures in haying where every piece of equipment we own including the trailer HAD to break down. I'll sum that up by sharing a snippet of a conversation I had with one of the implement dealers, he asks "Do you need a job", I answer "I have plenty of jobs, I need money." We learned a lot about our equipment and have a very clean fuel tank in the tractor now. I do know rebuilding a carburetor is on my winter to do list. The haying itself wasn't so bad, the time & money associated with equipment failure was maddening.
Kit had her first birthday and has taken her first steps. I believe you can tell a lot about a child's personality by how they learn to walk. Colin would not walk until he could do it perfectly. Kelsy at 9 months, our earliest walker, would take a step & fall, take 2 more steps, fall, take another step, fall. She was done crawling, and not that great of a walker but she was determined to be walking so that is what she did. Kierstyn walks when she wants as far as she wants. She will not walk to please you, nor will she walk if it is more convenient to crawl. I definitely see the stubborn streak that I see exhibited in my other brown-eyed daughter.
The great time we had the 4th of July reunion spending time with familiar faces and meeting new ones. 2 litters of kittens born and how very cute they are. The day spent at the waterpark. The wonderful weekend we spent camping with our family, away from work & home. Kiki's broken arm. Colin finally finding the motivation to get his learner's permit. The good, the bad & the ugly of the county fair. Chris's trip to urgent care when his asthma wasn't responding to his inhalers. Spencer's 8th birthday and how Jelly Belly rocked, the Kenosha Public Museum rocked, the lake rocked, White Castle rocked, but the rest of the day sucked! Spoken by Spencer as he was sobbing when things weren't quite the way he wanted them to be. 6 month anniversary of Dad's death.
Zucchini recipes perhaps? Since we are eating it at least 2x a day. Tomorrow perhaps. Followed by the 2 pvc chicken tractors I've made this past week in anticipation for the chicks that are arriving today or tomorrow. A little excited about them and the hope that chickens won't be feeding the area wildlife.
I am going to write about a friend.On July 3rd Micheal Fagan left this world much too soon for his family & friends. Micheal was.... Micheal... and sometimes Mike. A character for sure. The first time we met him. Chris had just gotten a job in Medford MA, near Boston. We were moving from North Adams and looking for an apartment in Clinton, the best little down by a dam site. Clinton is South of Leominster (lemon-ster) and North of Worcester (woosta). We were told the townhouse was on Clock street. We follow the directions we were given and we come to this road with no road sign, but it should be Clock. We this man on the front step and ask him if he knows where "Clock Street" is. No he doesn't. So we ask what street is this without the sign, he tells us its "Clock Street". This story loses much of its humor without sound. Micheal had a very thick Boston/Worcester accent. And he wasn't saying "clock" he was saying Clark, which is what the landlord was saying too.
He ended up being our nextdoor neighbor for a year. We couldn't have asked for better neighbors. There was Mike and Vicki and their 3 teen-aged kids. We were 6 of us then, Spencer was just 3 months when we moved in. Of course it took us a while to become friends. And with a psycho neighbor on the other side it helped with the bonding. Calli just adored their oldest, James. She still has his bandanna he gave her when we moved. Chris & I would go over there most nights, or they would come to our place. We'd usually play cards, drink iced coffee. We shared an enclosed porch, so it was so easy if the kids wanted to go over or stay home. Mike adored Spencer. He'd take the baby and they would go dead head the flowers. I think Spencer's continued love for flowers came directly from that. Spencer called Mike "Allah", and of course Micheal had no complaints about that. It was about time someone had figured it out.
He was crazy. Couldn't sit still. Didn't even sleep much. He drove cab just for the fun of it. He had another full time job. He loved his family. Loved going to Long Sands. They were gracious enough to include us in on a trip. That was wonderful. Even when the dog ate Mike's teeth. He got over that pretty quick. When we moved they not only helped us load the truck, they stored some of our stuff and drove it out to us. I'm glad they did because it meant we got to see them again. And of course because Mike could never be anywhere without working he painted our dining room walls They were GORGEOUS!
Mike was diagnosed with cancer a few years ago. As friendships & life sometimes go I hadn't spoken to Vicki for awhile. I always have something going on. They bought a house, have a granddaughter busy with kids and life. When we spoke after not talking for awhile she told me. At that point he had already lived longer than the dr's predicted. As a matter of fact he was doing really well and still driving cab. But the last few month's were hard on him, hard on all of the Fagan family. My heart goes out to them. When Vicki told me he died, via chat, I was glad it wasn't by phone as I cried. I'm tired of people dying.
I'm glad for the time we had in Clinton. I hold dear the memories we have and the difference the Fagans made in our life. Without question a part of Mike lives on in Spencer, in all of us. RIP Allah. I hope heaven is up for some improvement. I know you and Dad enjoyed chatting the few times he came to visit, so enjoy a smoke & say hi. Love to you Vicki, James, Amanda & Emily. Mean it.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Haying
We have started on this new adventure of "haying". We've been growing our own hay for awhile. And we've been doing the brutal work of helping bale and putting literally a 1000 + bales of hay in the barn each summer. Now we have to do it all which means more time and {gulp} more knowledge! UGH! Hopefully this will be a good decision. It certainly is a challenging one - and challenges keep us young, right? We really didn't have many choices.
Last year we had someone cut on shares. That meant he cut half of what he baled. And he only was able to get 2 cuttings in- a summer when everyone we knew got 3 or 4 cuttings. Needless to say we were hurting for hay and even had to buy some this winter. And it was awful horrible hay. Our animals would rather eat our straw than the hay. So its costing us twice - the cost of hay and the cost from reduced weight and production in our animals. We need to make this jump. We did cut it ok. Huge learning curve on using the sickle mower properly, but in the end it went pretty well. Then the raking. Again, first half the field doesn't look so pretty , but the second half looks mighty good. But then it rained, and rained, and rained. So now we need to wait. And let it dry, and dry some more. The hay will still be usable, just not as good. Certainly no worse than what we've been buying. Wish we had a tedder. We could get one for another $1000. But then I'd have to give up my spa treatments. Oh well.
Last year we had someone cut on shares. That meant he cut half of what he baled. And he only was able to get 2 cuttings in- a summer when everyone we knew got 3 or 4 cuttings. Needless to say we were hurting for hay and even had to buy some this winter. And it was awful horrible hay. Our animals would rather eat our straw than the hay. So its costing us twice - the cost of hay and the cost from reduced weight and production in our animals. We need to make this jump. We did cut it ok. Huge learning curve on using the sickle mower properly, but in the end it went pretty well. Then the raking. Again, first half the field doesn't look so pretty , but the second half looks mighty good. But then it rained, and rained, and rained. So now we need to wait. And let it dry, and dry some more. The hay will still be usable, just not as good. Certainly no worse than what we've been buying. Wish we had a tedder. We could get one for another $1000. But then I'd have to give up my spa treatments. Oh well.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Wonderful Birthday!
I had a wonderful day yesterday. Chris took the day off of work to spend it with me. Colin milked the goats. My mom & Chris got Calli to band and the boys to art (yes something I normally do by myself :). I did my health risk assessment through Chris' work. And thank goodness as I had to fast and nursing moms should not be fasting until 11:30am! The blood taker could not have been more flattering. Good way to get the day going. Spent a wonderful afternoon with friends, and they even cared enough to bake and buy me a cake - yes 2 cakes! We went to Madison to pick up my cheeses cultures, but they had accidentally shipped them. They apologized profusely and gave us our shipping money back immediately without us asking for it. They brought the man out who made the mistake and he apologized. Wonderful customer service. The cultures should still be here today and I can't wait! We returned Colin's computer and textbooks. We went to Barnes & Noble and got an Indian & Thai cookbook Kids bought some stuff too - addicts! Went to Calli's soccer game. Best I've seen Calli play so far. That was a real joy. Got into a discussion with a parent on our team about what offsides was. It was funny because he was wrong, another parent on the other side was wrong too. Ref was right, I was right (it does happen). Poor kids are getting yelled at, ref is getting yelled. This is why Colin quit reffing. These refs go through hours and hours of class they get re-certified every year. Who do you suppose knows more about offsides? A parent who has never played or opened a rule book or the ref? If you ask the parent, its the parent - not the punk 14 year old kid. Anyway I tried to explain off sides to this parent so he'd understand the game and quit yelling at his kid and the ref - I just thought it was a matter of him not understanding how it worked. But no, he's just an ass. Instead of considering the possibility that the kids were doing it right, and the ref was calling it right, and I understood what was going on - no, we were all wrong and he was right. Oh yeah- that's why I quit coaching too. Anyway Calli's team lost even though Calli was awesome. Then we went to dinner. An old Indian restaurant that was remodeled, renamed and a new menu. Mango lassis were gratis. Service was SLOW but friendly. Most of the food was fantastic. Chana Paneer and Lamb Khana Mateer were exceptional. The most expensive item - the Bombay Platter was very disappointing. When they asked Chris was honest and said "not good". At first the owner started defending the dish. Chris pointed out that we liked and even loved the other dishes, this one just wasn't good. He then acknowledged the possibility, apologized and brought us 3 different desserts. We will be back. Like I said service was slow and we did not get home until after 11pm. Very late for this old lady! Of course I had to Kit back to sleep once we got home. And I had to start reading the book Kiki had bought me. It was a wonderful day - and like my first 40 years- went by much too quickly.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Today I am 40
Yes indeed, today is my birthday. I was born 40 years to a young mother (aren't they all) in St Paul Minnesota. I was born on a Monday, the day after Mother's Day. That's the way I was, always going to make my mother earn it. I was a cute lil thing. Round face. Lots of hair, just like my kids. If you've seen Calli or kit- you've seen me as a baby.
Hard to believe I am 40 - don't tell my mom, she still says she's 39 :) - I don't feel 40, I don't think I look 40. But what does 40 feel & look like? I guess how I feel & look. Tired for sure, but that happened when I first had kids 16 years ago. The few gray hairs I have are the same ones I had at 20. I definitely feel aches more. And I'm starting to see wrinkles. Things sure do sag more than they used to, but I'm sure 6 babies didn't help the cause on that. I can play on the "old-timers" softball league, but that is for people 35 & up. I just don't feel old. And when I was called "middle -aged" the other day I would've shot lasers if I could have. Being 40 doesn't bother me. Its just an age. Being called middle-aged is a perception, a judgment even. That I don't like being called. I certainly plan on living longer than 80. I've got too much aggravation to provide.
Time is so weird. The first 20 years of my life went by so slowly. Playground, daycare, school, homework, friends, sports, work - Routine, someone else calling the shots, dependence. Birth, School, Work, Death (anyone else know that song?) Now I have a life that is quite void of a routine, even if I wanted it to be, many people completely dependent on me. Within certain parameters I call the shots, although I am certainly a slave to my kids sports and other activities. And this last 20 years have flown by. I guess its true that time flies when you are having fun. And I am. I am having an absolute blast. Not that everyday is a great day, but big picture, I could not have asked for anything more.
Funny thing is, if someone can up to me 20 years ago and said hey - time to make some choices. One of your choices is a wonderful husband that is utterly devoted to you and 1st priority in his life is to make you happy. Along with that comes 6 kids, that you will homeschool. 6 kids that will love you, question you, push you to insanity, make you laugh uncontrollably, and cause you more than once to look for the car keys so you can journey far away for a very long time, but you never will. A small farm where you will be feeding pigs, chasing goats, and milking those same goats, tending to steers, herding sheep, and keeping some chickens & ducks. In a very rural area 1 hour away from a "real" city. (remember born & raised in a major metropolitan area, small town is a major adjustment for me). You will not have a "career". Nice clothes are a complete waste of money until your youngest child is 10. You will not get paid with dollars, only hugs, kisses and at times complete irritation & disdain by your teenagers. You will be completely undervalued by the world, and at times by your own family. You will be actively working from sunrise to sundown, and even then you will still be on-call. There is no time off, there is no vacation, only a change of scenery. You liked being a short order cook? Great because from now on nearly every meal will be provided by you. And with 8 people in the family you will have fun putting something on the table that is nutritional and tasty to everyone. And remember the adults in the family do not want to eat the same thing twice in the same week. Traveling is definitely something you will do a lot of. Not to other countries or states, but to soccer, 4-h, art, performances, this activity that activity. You'll be traveling all the time. You will get plenty of me time - when you are waiting in the car for children to have completed their activity. And this man you can't get enough of now - you won't get enough of him later either. Between work and farm and kids - you'll still be scheduling dates. But not being 20 years old anymore you will need to sleep, so guess what gets pushed to the side? That's right, romance. But think of how much fun you will have with an empty house in 20 more years. And since you like challenges, your husband, best friend, and partner, will travel a lot. This will give you opportunity to appreciate how hard it was for your mother and other single parents to raise your children and appreciate your husband that much more. You will use your college degree daily in raising & teaching your children. Your vocabulary will be absolutely diminished as you spend most of your time interpreting and speaking to young people. As your children get older and their vocabulary expands you will look like a complete dunce to them as you search for a word that means really, really big. (You mean "expansive" mom?!) You will have some great friends to share your burdens, joys & sorrows with, but with your moving frequently you will also lose touch with some wonderful people.
How about it? Sound like a great way to spend the next 20 years of your life? I'm not sure I would have said yes, sign me up. Sounds great. Exactly what I have dreamed about. I always wanted to be a slave! Will I really get to pick up puke, and clean out poopy pants at the grocery store when I couldn't get a four-year old to the bathroom quick enough? Will I truly be able to run through cornfields chasing sheep a mile away? Do you promise that my husband will be gone every January so I can shovel/plow the driveway by myself? How could I say no?
But then I would have missed the hugs and kisses and cuddles & "I love you - enough" and "Happy Birthdays", and "I don't want you I want Mommy", and "Mama you are the best" and "I am so lucky to have you as a mom" and "Thank you mom" and the smiles and the laughs, the quiet times and the loud times and all the indescribable times that makes my life worth living. No better than that. Makes my life fantastic. And while I would trade with someone for a day, I would never give up my life and the people I share it with.
I am thrilled to be 40 years old. It has been years well spent. So when you look at this 40 year old body and you see the extra weight, that is weight I put on creating 6 wonderful people. When you see the wrinkles that are starting, those are wrinkles from laughing and crying and spending many days playing & working in the sun. The gray hairs - well I had those at 20, so those just are.
Thank you to my mom for having me, I wouldn't change a thing. I like who I am, and my childhood had much to do with it. Thank you to my friends for being their for me in person & virtually. I am very lucky to have people who care about me and share experiences with me and like me anyway. Thank you to my children who have brought me untold joy that far outweighs the trials & tribulations. Thank you to my extended family for still claiming me as yours. Thank you to my husband for sharing your life with me, there is no one else I would rather share this adventure with. Thanks to everyone who has come into my life (or left it) to make my life so spectacular. I am grateful to you all. I look forward to another wonderful 40 years and seeing what life has in store for me, I just hope they go a little slower.
Hard to believe I am 40 - don't tell my mom, she still says she's 39 :) - I don't feel 40, I don't think I look 40. But what does 40 feel & look like? I guess how I feel & look. Tired for sure, but that happened when I first had kids 16 years ago. The few gray hairs I have are the same ones I had at 20. I definitely feel aches more. And I'm starting to see wrinkles. Things sure do sag more than they used to, but I'm sure 6 babies didn't help the cause on that. I can play on the "old-timers" softball league, but that is for people 35 & up. I just don't feel old. And when I was called "middle -aged" the other day I would've shot lasers if I could have. Being 40 doesn't bother me. Its just an age. Being called middle-aged is a perception, a judgment even. That I don't like being called. I certainly plan on living longer than 80. I've got too much aggravation to provide. 
Funny thing is, if someone can up to me 20 years ago and said hey - time to make some choices. One of your choices is a wonderful husband that is utterly devoted to you and 1st priority in his life is to make you happy. Along with that comes 6 kids, that you will homeschool. 6 kids that will love you, question you, push you to insanity, make you laugh uncontrollably, and cause you more than once to look for the car keys so you can journey far away for a very long time, but you never will. A small farm where you will be feeding pigs, chasing goats, and milking those same goats, tending to steers, herding sheep, and keeping some chickens & ducks. In a very rural area 1 hour away from a "real" city. (remember born & raised in a major metropolitan area, small town is a major adjustment for me). You will not have a "career". Nice clothes are a complete waste of money until your youngest child is 10. You will not get paid with dollars, only hugs, kisses and at times complete irritation & disdain by your teenagers. You will be completely undervalued by the world, and at times by your own family. You will be actively working from sunrise to sundown, and even then you will still be on-call. There is no time off, there is no vacation, only a change of scenery. You liked being a short order cook? Great because from now on nearly every meal will be provided by you. And with 8 people in the family you will have fun putting something on the table that is nutritional and tasty to everyone. And remember the adults in the family do not want to eat the same thing twice in the same week. Traveling is definitely something you will do a lot of. Not to other countries or states, but to soccer, 4-h, art, performances, this activity that activity. You'll be traveling all the time. You will get plenty of me time - when you are waiting in the car for children to have completed their activity. And this man you can't get enough of now - you won't get enough of him later either. Between work and farm and kids - you'll still be scheduling dates. But not being 20 years old anymore you will need to sleep, so guess what gets pushed to the side? That's right, romance. But think of how much fun you will have with an empty house in 20 more years. And since you like challenges, your husband, best friend, and partner, will travel a lot. This will give you opportunity to appreciate how hard it was for your mother and other single parents to raise your children and appreciate your husband that much more. You will use your college degree daily in raising & teaching your children. Your vocabulary will be absolutely diminished as you spend most of your time interpreting and speaking to young people. As your children get older and their vocabulary expands you will look like a complete dunce to them as you search for a word that means really, really big. (You mean "expansive" mom?!) You will have some great friends to share your burdens, joys & sorrows with, but with your moving frequently you will also lose touch with some wonderful people.How about it? Sound like a great way to spend the next 20 years of your life? I'm not sure I would have said yes, sign me up. Sounds great. Exactly what I have dreamed about. I always wanted to be a slave! Will I really get to pick up puke, and clean out poopy pants at the grocery store when I couldn't get a four-year old to the bathroom quick enough? Will I truly be able to run through cornfields chasing sheep a mile away? Do you promise that my husband will be gone every January so I can shovel/plow the driveway by myself? How could I say no?
But then I would have missed the hugs and kisses and cuddles & "I love you - enough" and "Happy Birthdays", and "I don't want you I want Mommy", and "Mama you are the best" and "I am so lucky to have you as a mom" and "Thank you mom" and the smiles and the laughs, the quiet times and the loud times and all the indescribable times that makes my life worth living. No better than that. Makes my life fantastic. And while I would trade with someone for a day, I would never give up my life and the people I share it with.
I am thrilled to be 40 years old. It has been years well spent. So when you look at this 40 year old body and you see the extra weight, that is weight I put on creating 6 wonderful people. When you see the wrinkles that are starting, those are wrinkles from laughing and crying and spending many days playing & working in the sun. The gray hairs - well I had those at 20, so those just are.
Thank you to my mom for having me, I wouldn't change a thing. I like who I am, and my childhood had much to do with it. Thank you to my friends for being their for me in person & virtually. I am very lucky to have people who care about me and share experiences with me and like me anyway. Thank you to my children who have brought me untold joy that far outweighs the trials & tribulations. Thank you to my extended family for still claiming me as yours. Thank you to my husband for sharing your life with me, there is no one else I would rather share this adventure with. Thanks to everyone who has come into my life (or left it) to make my life so spectacular. I am grateful to you all. I look forward to another wonderful 40 years and seeing what life has in store for me, I just hope they go a little slower.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Spring is crazy!
Spring is crazy! Our schedule anyway. The weather too as far as that goes. Looking at my calendar I can see we have days where we are double booked. Not sure how that is going to work. Actually I am - we aren't going to be able to do some things. My mom is coming today and will stay at least through Tin's 5th Birthday next week. Same day as the Shakespeare performance. Tomorrow is particularly bad - not looking like a relaxing birthday for me, but its also a day I get to see friends, and that is always a plus. Hopefully with my mom here she will pick up some of the driving duties and I can get more done simply because I'm not being interrupted so much.
The garden is coming along. Always much to do, weeding, planting, new beds. I'm very happy with the seedlings this year. Tomatoes are looking great. A few more weeks before they are going out. Everyone helped clean up beds so they will be ready for the tomatoes, peppers, squash and the 3rd planting of carrots & greens. I am very thankful that we did not experience the freezing that other parts of Wisconsin got this past week.
Our hayfield is just about ready to be cut. The early warm weather and the recent rain has most of the alfalfa at just above my knee. With this next week of rain it should be ready to cut next week. The early forecast even looks like the skies will cooperate with us too. Our schedule not so much.
Grandma Jean is recovering well. We are very grateful for that. In no time at all she'll be back in her garden.
The garden is coming along. Always much to do, weeding, planting, new beds. I'm very happy with the seedlings this year. Tomatoes are looking great. A few more weeks before they are going out. Everyone helped clean up beds so they will be ready for the tomatoes, peppers, squash and the 3rd planting of carrots & greens. I am very thankful that we did not experience the freezing that other parts of Wisconsin got this past week.
Our hayfield is just about ready to be cut. The early warm weather and the recent rain has most of the alfalfa at just above my knee. With this next week of rain it should be ready to cut next week. The early forecast even looks like the skies will cooperate with us too. Our schedule not so much.
Grandma Jean is recovering well. We are very grateful for that. In no time at all she'll be back in her garden.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Yesterday we had a fabulous day outside observing Cinco de Mayo (do you know what its about?) in an amazing amount of wind. Afterwards it was swim team sign-up, Kiki & Colin's soccer practice, and Tin Tin's "soccer". All at roughly the same time, in 4 different locations. We did it though!
Tin is doing "Passing Penguins" at the Y. With much begging & pleading and very cute faces and much flattery, both Spencer & Tin convinced me to be a coach for their respective teams. It really is more like babysitting than coaching, but it means I have to be there and I need to be attentive. I am one of 6 parent "coaches" and there is a head coach. There are 60+ 4 & 5 year olds in all split up into 2 teams, red & black. Tin is red. Half the time they spend running around learning how to move the ball with their feet. The other 30 minutes kids were split up into small groups of 3 red players & 3 black players and sent with a "coach". At this point they learned how to not use their hands while playing soccer. As in no pulling, punching, hitting, grabbing, or tackling of the other players.
The kids were great. The problem was their t-shirts. As I said they have red or black t-shirts. As they progress games will become more like real soccer and teams will be made from whoever shows up, red vs black. In the past we had set teams with a dozen different colors, 1 color for each team. But a few problems arose from that. First you never know whos going to show up. 6 yellow team players show up, but only 2 of the green team. Secondly there is 1 white player that has been kicking the ball around since he was 6 months and one blue player that is just as good, so unless they are playing against each other its just the one kid dominating everyone. So I am totally onboard with splitting the group in half and essentially having pick up games every week. It decreases some of the competitiveness too as their is no "team". And seeing as these are 4 & 5 year old kids, it just isn't necessary.
So what is my problem with the t-shirts? The name. Due to safety the kids no longer have their first name on the backs of their t-shirts. They have their last name, not their first as in years past. Its a safety issue so our kids aren't running around in public with their first names on their back. Do you know how many 4 & 5 year olds even know their last name? Of those how many would respond to it? Tin thinks his last name is Paula. So as I'm supervising these 6 children that are pulling, punching, hitting, grabbing, and tackling each other to get the ball I have to REMEMBER the name they just told me. Fortunately Tin was in my group so that brought it down to 5 names, and 1 was a girl, ok I can remember that. 4 boys, 2 blond & 2 brown hair. All short crew cut styles. 2 had the same name. So only 3 names to remember. I did ok, but it was really much more stressful than it should've been. And the kicker is I will not be working with these same kids next week. Over the course of 6 weeks I will be working with 60 different kids for 1 hour a week. I will not know their names. I think that isn't fair to the kid.
I will not debate the safety issue of a child wearing a t-shirt with his or her name on it in public. There are different viewpoints on that and its a parent's prerogative. But I don't think the answer was to take the name off the shirt. Those shirts served a purpose. Its a uniform. Red or black so the kids know who their teammate is, a name so the coach isn't saying "hey you". If a parent doesn't want the child having his/her name displayed in public, don't wear the shirt off the soccer field. Its that simple. Kids don't wear their other jerseys off the field/court/pool. Don't wear these off the field. Throw them away, burn them, make them into a quilt http://www.favecraftsblog.com/soccer-jersey-quilt/ whatever you feel comfortable with. I think this is another example of paranoia going too far. I understand vigilance and safety. And I know in the big scheme of things this is not a big deal, but I do believe this will do more harm than good. Parents will still complain about a "bad" move even if they don't know a kids name, but you aren't going to hear as many "good shot Adam" from someone other than a parent, because no one will know the kids name. And a predator will still approach a kid on the park - "Hi, your mom "Mrs Olson" wants you to help me look for my dog" or whatever, I'm not a predator so I don't know how they operate. Taking the name off the t-shirt isn't going to protect our kids its just going to aggravate people who are trying to help our kids. But apparently I'm easily aggravated lately. :)
So those who know Tin, yes he did his fair share of pulling, punching, hitting, grabbing, and tackling, but he certainly wasn't the worse. His biggest issue was dropping on the ball when other kids tried to take it. What he wasn't figuring out were the other kids would still try to kick the ball and their feet would have to get through his body & face to get there. Overall he did very well and he had much fun!
Tin is doing "Passing Penguins" at the Y. With much begging & pleading and very cute faces and much flattery, both Spencer & Tin convinced me to be a coach for their respective teams. It really is more like babysitting than coaching, but it means I have to be there and I need to be attentive. I am one of 6 parent "coaches" and there is a head coach. There are 60+ 4 & 5 year olds in all split up into 2 teams, red & black. Tin is red. Half the time they spend running around learning how to move the ball with their feet. The other 30 minutes kids were split up into small groups of 3 red players & 3 black players and sent with a "coach". At this point they learned how to not use their hands while playing soccer. As in no pulling, punching, hitting, grabbing, or tackling of the other players.
The kids were great. The problem was their t-shirts. As I said they have red or black t-shirts. As they progress games will become more like real soccer and teams will be made from whoever shows up, red vs black. In the past we had set teams with a dozen different colors, 1 color for each team. But a few problems arose from that. First you never know whos going to show up. 6 yellow team players show up, but only 2 of the green team. Secondly there is 1 white player that has been kicking the ball around since he was 6 months and one blue player that is just as good, so unless they are playing against each other its just the one kid dominating everyone. So I am totally onboard with splitting the group in half and essentially having pick up games every week. It decreases some of the competitiveness too as their is no "team". And seeing as these are 4 & 5 year old kids, it just isn't necessary.
So what is my problem with the t-shirts? The name. Due to safety the kids no longer have their first name on the backs of their t-shirts. They have their last name, not their first as in years past. Its a safety issue so our kids aren't running around in public with their first names on their back. Do you know how many 4 & 5 year olds even know their last name? Of those how many would respond to it? Tin thinks his last name is Paula. So as I'm supervising these 6 children that are pulling, punching, hitting, grabbing, and tackling each other to get the ball I have to REMEMBER the name they just told me. Fortunately Tin was in my group so that brought it down to 5 names, and 1 was a girl, ok I can remember that. 4 boys, 2 blond & 2 brown hair. All short crew cut styles. 2 had the same name. So only 3 names to remember. I did ok, but it was really much more stressful than it should've been. And the kicker is I will not be working with these same kids next week. Over the course of 6 weeks I will be working with 60 different kids for 1 hour a week. I will not know their names. I think that isn't fair to the kid.
I will not debate the safety issue of a child wearing a t-shirt with his or her name on it in public. There are different viewpoints on that and its a parent's prerogative. But I don't think the answer was to take the name off the shirt. Those shirts served a purpose. Its a uniform. Red or black so the kids know who their teammate is, a name so the coach isn't saying "hey you". If a parent doesn't want the child having his/her name displayed in public, don't wear the shirt off the soccer field. Its that simple. Kids don't wear their other jerseys off the field/court/pool. Don't wear these off the field. Throw them away, burn them, make them into a quilt http://www.favecraftsblog.com/soccer-jersey-quilt/ whatever you feel comfortable with. I think this is another example of paranoia going too far. I understand vigilance and safety. And I know in the big scheme of things this is not a big deal, but I do believe this will do more harm than good. Parents will still complain about a "bad" move even if they don't know a kids name, but you aren't going to hear as many "good shot Adam" from someone other than a parent, because no one will know the kids name. And a predator will still approach a kid on the park - "Hi, your mom "Mrs Olson" wants you to help me look for my dog" or whatever, I'm not a predator so I don't know how they operate. Taking the name off the t-shirt isn't going to protect our kids its just going to aggravate people who are trying to help our kids. But apparently I'm easily aggravated lately. :)
So those who know Tin, yes he did his fair share of pulling, punching, hitting, grabbing, and tackling, but he certainly wasn't the worse. His biggest issue was dropping on the ball when other kids tried to take it. What he wasn't figuring out were the other kids would still try to kick the ball and their feet would have to get through his body & face to get there. Overall he did very well and he had much fun!
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Ready or not - here we come!
As is my refrain as of late - I am so busy. The library is pretty much done. Downstairs bathroom is done. Upstairs bathroom has a new and working toilet but the carpet is only half up and we'll need more tiles. We are moving our room upstairs and Colin into our old room. And of course the normal cleaning of the house. For whatever reason my kids have missed the whole concept of try not to make messes and clean up the ones you make. Outside we have animals, a garden and seedlings that need frequent tending, soccer for 5 of our 6 kids (we missed the sign up for pre-walkers for Kit) that includes frequent travel to Madison an hour away, and sometimes further. Archery has started for Calli, every Tuesday night. We continue with 4-h, Art classes, and gym class. But the kids are trying to help. Spencer has really picked up some slack with his attempts to hang clothes on the line. The only problem with that is if the line is low enough for him to hang clothes on, then its low enough for clothes to hit the ground.
We have all of our baling equipment. Its pretty exciting.... and very intimidating. For the past 2 years we have learned about the theory of haying. We know when to cut, the pattern to use. Get alfalfa when just above knee high or when the very first blooms appear. Mow when you have 3 days of predicted no rain. Mow in the afternoon after the dew has evaporated. A tedder helps if there is some rain (which we do not have yet, and can live without). Bale in the afternoon, again with the dew. And haying is hot, sweaty, itchy, dirty, nasty, work. It requires you wear long sleeves, unless you want your arms all scratched up. But filling a hay mow with hay is SO VERY SATISFYING. And not having to buy junk hay is also very satisfying. The animals agree.
While we've been doing the grunt work the last 2 years, we haven't run the machinery. And that isn't something you can do by steps. You either have the machinery or you don't. So we've jumped in with both feet on this one. I'm glad we've seen it done, and worked closely with our hayers, but now its on us. I think we are ready for it. We have manuals or we are ordering them for all of the equipment. We have a very healthy respect for these machines. Kids have been lectured again & again that these are tools that can hurt if played with, but beneficial when used correctly, just like a car, or a blender, or a curling iron. We have researched and read, and read again about the ins and outs of haying. But now its time to do it. Ready or not here we come!
We have all of our baling equipment. Its pretty exciting.... and very intimidating. For the past 2 years we have learned about the theory of haying. We know when to cut, the pattern to use. Get alfalfa when just above knee high or when the very first blooms appear. Mow when you have 3 days of predicted no rain. Mow in the afternoon after the dew has evaporated. A tedder helps if there is some rain (which we do not have yet, and can live without). Bale in the afternoon, again with the dew. And haying is hot, sweaty, itchy, dirty, nasty, work. It requires you wear long sleeves, unless you want your arms all scratched up. But filling a hay mow with hay is SO VERY SATISFYING. And not having to buy junk hay is also very satisfying. The animals agree.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Self-Control
I've been beyond busy. I actually was up at 3:58 this morning cleaning my kitchen trying to get on top of all the things that have been sliding with our insane Spring schedule. Most nights we are not home before 8pm, we are completely away from home 3 days of the week, and most of the weekend. And of course Chris is gone this week as now Calli starts archery and Tin & Spencer start soccer. But I will take the time to write because I had time to think while gardening yesterday and I am outraged.
Recently it was stated by an acquaintance that it is a girl's responsibility to dress appropriately and modestly so as not to incite impure thoughts and actions in the males in our society. Men and boys are weak and cannot be held accountable for what they think and do when females dress in tank tops, shorter than the knee shorts, or expose a bare midriff.
This was said to a group of children and adults. Children as young as infants. As a parent of boys and girls I could not disagree more. This kind of statement excuses rape and blames the victim. I expect my boys, and girls, to exhibit self-control in their actions and words. I expect that we be cautious and practice common sense, but in no way does the way that someone dresses excuse someone else from making lewd comments or inappropriate actions. It is never someone's fault that they are raped or molested. This is insulting to men and women alike. Men are more than their hormones, women are more than sex objects.
This is the same thinking one would find in the Taliban, but we can find it here in America too. Ridiculous. And so I respond, How dare you!? It is not your job to tell me how to dress my children, or worse try to dress them yourself. It is not for you to dictate to me what God wants. (Last I checked God created our bodies and God does not make mistakes, yes?) It is not for you to tell me how I am failing my children. It is your job to teach your children self-control. It is your job to look into yourself and ask why do you see something sexual about a 5 year old. Would you blame a 5 year because she was molested? You tell me there are predators in our community and I respect that and protect my children by building their self-confidence and making them strong beings. But you are who scares me. Thinking you know what is best for everyone else, who knows God's wishes, who sees something provocative in a child, who thinks boys cannot practice self-control. You who are raising your children to believe this. This scares me much more than a child's bare shoulder or belly button. Stop blaming others and clean your own house - or in other words - take the log out of your eye before you worry about the speck in mine.
Recently it was stated by an acquaintance that it is a girl's responsibility to dress appropriately and modestly so as not to incite impure thoughts and actions in the males in our society. Men and boys are weak and cannot be held accountable for what they think and do when females dress in tank tops, shorter than the knee shorts, or expose a bare midriff.
This was said to a group of children and adults. Children as young as infants. As a parent of boys and girls I could not disagree more. This kind of statement excuses rape and blames the victim. I expect my boys, and girls, to exhibit self-control in their actions and words. I expect that we be cautious and practice common sense, but in no way does the way that someone dresses excuse someone else from making lewd comments or inappropriate actions. It is never someone's fault that they are raped or molested. This is insulting to men and women alike. Men are more than their hormones, women are more than sex objects.
This is the same thinking one would find in the Taliban, but we can find it here in America too. Ridiculous. And so I respond, How dare you!? It is not your job to tell me how to dress my children, or worse try to dress them yourself. It is not for you to dictate to me what God wants. (Last I checked God created our bodies and God does not make mistakes, yes?) It is not for you to tell me how I am failing my children. It is your job to teach your children self-control. It is your job to look into yourself and ask why do you see something sexual about a 5 year old. Would you blame a 5 year because she was molested? You tell me there are predators in our community and I respect that and protect my children by building their self-confidence and making them strong beings. But you are who scares me. Thinking you know what is best for everyone else, who knows God's wishes, who sees something provocative in a child, who thinks boys cannot practice self-control. You who are raising your children to believe this. This scares me much more than a child's bare shoulder or belly button. Stop blaming others and clean your own house - or in other words - take the log out of your eye before you worry about the speck in mine.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Classes
Been busy. Trying to catch up on animal duties, going to classes, and purging the house of unnecessary items. In addition to the regular mom stuff. I've been attending classes called "Annies Project". Its been informative and helpful as we try to determine what direction we want to head with the farm as a business. That has been every Tuesday, although its been more like every other, since I missed the second Tuesday for dad's funeral and the 4th Tuesday was canceled due to snow. Pretty much if Chris was not traveling I've missed class, makes me sort of anxious about this Tuesday since Chris is not traveling.
I went to a "Pig CSA" class on Saturday. Class description is
Starting a Pig CSA
Share our experiences in starting a pork Community Supported Agriculture program. We discuss the overall structure of our pork CSA program, how we market it and some of the questions that have come up. We also talk about communications with CSA members, how we raise our pigs and some of the challenges we had in our first season.
I should have taken the "first season" literally as in first season of raising pigs. Don't get me wrong, I did learn more about their CSA than I knew before I walked through the door.
I also learned about what people will do. And how much they will pay. I learned we are selling our pigs dirt cheap, and they are not medicated. And prophylactically medicated animals have been linked to MRSA. Actually I should rephrase. MRSA has never been found on a farm where animals were NOT treated with antibiotics prophylactically (as a preventative). MRSA has only been found on farms where animals are fed low doses of antibiotics in hopes of preventing disease. Back to prices. These very nice people with CSA experience, but very little pig experience, charge $2.40 a lb live weight. Plus processing. We charge $2.25 a lb hanging weight, which means no head and gutted. That usually accounts for 25% decrease in weight. So a 250lb live weight pig from their farm will be medicated and cost you $600 + processing. That same pig at our farm would not have been medicated and cost $422 + processing.
In addition they charged people 75% of the anticipated total cost up front. Now I think that is actually a good idea. They knew who had committed, no marketing or scrambling at the last minute, they knew how many pigs they needed, they had the money up front to cover feed, that part is pretty smart, and I would like to try something similar. The issue I see is they had virtually no experience raising pigs and if their pig died people agreed they would not get their money back. Who would give $400 to someone who had no experience raising pigs??? As it was the growers did lose a pig this year, and hadn't raised any extras. They considered the dead pig their pig, so they raised 10 pigs this year and they didn't get one. I would have done the same thing to keep customers happy, but I started farming to feed my family quality product so I would not be happy about that. And I think that is part of our quality control, if I would not serve this food to my family, I'm not selling it.
I am thinking of doing do something similar. We need to find a good processor that we can count on. Apparently a difficult feat. I also think we will do a 4 payment sort of thing. A deposit, another payment 2 months later, a third payment shortly before butchering time, and the last payment after processing when we know the final weight. I think it will help people with budgeting. There is no question that our naturally raised, on pasture/dirt, no antibiotics or hormones is a bargain at less than $4 a lb. Yes that is expensive ground pork, but really cheap bacon and tenderloin. And the benefit to your health. Regardless, that is a large outlay of money to come up with all at once, spreading it out should help some people.
Anyway, it was definitely informative on the CSA aspect, but not so much on pig raising, except to show me how much I already knew. Oh and if you want to reserve a pig for this fall, let me know. We still have 1/2 a pig going to butcher March 3rd.
I went to a "Pig CSA" class on Saturday. Class description is
Starting a Pig CSA
Share our experiences in starting a pork Community Supported Agriculture program. We discuss the overall structure of our pork CSA program, how we market it and some of the questions that have come up. We also talk about communications with CSA members, how we raise our pigs and some of the challenges we had in our first season.
I should have taken the "first season" literally as in first season of raising pigs. Don't get me wrong, I did learn more about their CSA than I knew before I walked through the door.
I also learned about what people will do. And how much they will pay. I learned we are selling our pigs dirt cheap, and they are not medicated. And prophylactically medicated animals have been linked to MRSA. Actually I should rephrase. MRSA has never been found on a farm where animals were NOT treated with antibiotics prophylactically (as a preventative). MRSA has only been found on farms where animals are fed low doses of antibiotics in hopes of preventing disease. Back to prices. These very nice people with CSA experience, but very little pig experience, charge $2.40 a lb live weight. Plus processing. We charge $2.25 a lb hanging weight, which means no head and gutted. That usually accounts for 25% decrease in weight. So a 250lb live weight pig from their farm will be medicated and cost you $600 + processing. That same pig at our farm would not have been medicated and cost $422 + processing.
In addition they charged people 75% of the anticipated total cost up front. Now I think that is actually a good idea. They knew who had committed, no marketing or scrambling at the last minute, they knew how many pigs they needed, they had the money up front to cover feed, that part is pretty smart, and I would like to try something similar. The issue I see is they had virtually no experience raising pigs and if their pig died people agreed they would not get their money back. Who would give $400 to someone who had no experience raising pigs??? As it was the growers did lose a pig this year, and hadn't raised any extras. They considered the dead pig their pig, so they raised 10 pigs this year and they didn't get one. I would have done the same thing to keep customers happy, but I started farming to feed my family quality product so I would not be happy about that. And I think that is part of our quality control, if I would not serve this food to my family, I'm not selling it.
I am thinking of doing do something similar. We need to find a good processor that we can count on. Apparently a difficult feat. I also think we will do a 4 payment sort of thing. A deposit, another payment 2 months later, a third payment shortly before butchering time, and the last payment after processing when we know the final weight. I think it will help people with budgeting. There is no question that our naturally raised, on pasture/dirt, no antibiotics or hormones is a bargain at less than $4 a lb. Yes that is expensive ground pork, but really cheap bacon and tenderloin. And the benefit to your health. Regardless, that is a large outlay of money to come up with all at once, spreading it out should help some people.
Anyway, it was definitely informative on the CSA aspect, but not so much on pig raising, except to show me how much I already knew. Oh and if you want to reserve a pig for this fall, let me know. We still have 1/2 a pig going to butcher March 3rd.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
New Life
On top of Chris' dad dying, Chris' step-mom's step-dad has died. It is a very difficult time for this family. Chris's sister of course is sad, but as she said at least this time it makes sense. In the midst of all this we see new life. Obviously, and most importantly for me is my family where baby Kit is getting so big and brings us so much joy. And our eldest Colin is a month away from turning 16. All of the children are so smart and compassionate. They make us smile daily and also challenge us to make us better people :)
In a smaller more mundane way we continue to see life renewed. We have Bachelor Buttons sprouting. A bit early, but Spencer and I decided we needed a little new life around here. We have eggs going into the incubator, and in a month we'll have chicks and ducklings. And even more exciting we have our first new kid (goat) of the year. Our first time mom "Princess" had a buckling. He is very cute! Born this morning, Valentine's Day 2010. The kid's have said that we will accept suggestions for a name, so lets hear them.
So small things, but we are reminded that life continues and good times will come again. These hurts will be less painful, and loved ones will never be forgotten.
Click here to see more baby goat pictures
In a smaller more mundane way we continue to see life renewed. We have Bachelor Buttons sprouting. A bit early, but Spencer and I decided we needed a little new life around here. We have eggs going into the incubator, and in a month we'll have chicks and ducklings. And even more exciting we have our first new kid (goat) of the year. Our first time mom "Princess" had a buckling. He is very cute! Born this morning, Valentine's Day 2010. The kid's have said that we will accept suggestions for a name, so lets hear them.So small things, but we are reminded that life continues and good times will come again. These hurts will be less painful, and loved ones will never be forgotten.
Click here to see more baby goat pictures
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Pondering
While discussing the death of grandpa we started discussing heaven. Colin did not think it could be heaven if you are taken away from all the people you care about. I responded that he can still see us, he didn't lose us, we lost him. Then Colin asked a another very good question of "How can it be heaven when you see all the people you love suffering so?" I think he makes an excellent point. I couldn't answer that at the time. As I thought more about it I imagine its like many little hurts we see our children deal with daily. The stubbed toe, the screams because its time to wash your hair, I don't want to go to bed. These things that seem so important and so wrong. Please don't make me wash my hair, please. The pleas are real. This child feels his world is closing in on him. He does not understand. But we know everything will be alright. We know he isn't going to drown, the water won't burn, there is no harm or danger here. The fear and pain is created by himself and his own perceptions and desires. We feel for our child when they are so worked up, but we know that things are fine and we don't share their pain or fear. I wonder if its similar when a loved one dies. They still have a connection to us. They know everything is fine. They know we have nothing to fear. They feel for us, but they have a different perspective. They know there hasn't been a loss. They understand what we don't.Obviously I don't know, I haven't died. Nor has anyone that talks back to me. But Colin is right, how can it be heaven when you see all these people suffering because you are gone. As a mother I would hate to cause that kind of pain on my family. Of course I want to be missed. We all want to think we bring something to this world and our leaving it will be noticed (as a bad thing). But I don't want to cause suffering. Some of our suffering with dad is his youth. While not a child, 64 is barely past middle age. It was so unexpected, there has been no time to get used to this idea. When my grandfather died 7 years ago I was able to talk to him before he died. He was ready to die. He was tired. He lived a good life and was ready for the rest he deserved. While I didn't like the words I was hearing while we were talking, they have been very comforting in the time since. He had come to terms with his time here on earth. He was ready for the next journey. He had raised his children. Met his grandchildren, and even met some of his great-grandchildren. He was 85 years old in a body that could not keep up with him anymore. His bags were packed and he had bought his ticket, he was just waiting for the train now. While there were many tears at my grandpa's funeral, I don't think there was as much denial. Or the feeling that we had been robbed.
With dad we feel robbed. We feel so vulnerable. Our Dad, Husband, and Grandfather has been snatched from us. We were not ready to let him go. He and his wife were discussing a 65th birthday party. My youngest will not remember her grandpa, not even sure my 4 year old will. Sara never felt she needed to rush so her kids would know her dad. And if we feel robbed, does he? That is what Colin was getting at. How can it be heaven when you aren't ready to die? Sure I would love to go to Hawaii. But if someone pulled up and threw me in a car and then flew me to Hawaii, even if it were free, I would not be happy. I'd be worried about my family. How could I get word to them that I'm alright? How could I enjoy myself knowing, (or not knowing ) my family is suffering?
So I have to deal with this somehow. And all I can come up with is he knows how we are and he can see things from a different perspective. He knows we will be alright. He knows we can make it through. He knows we are strong enough. He knows in the big scheme of things all we are being expected to do is wash our hair. I guess I understand why Tin prefers his hair dirty.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Denial
For obvious reasons death has been consuming my thoughts a lot. Dad had a wonderful turnout for his funeral. Standing room only, not only in the actual room which we figured sat 150+, but standing room only in the lounge/reception area. A testament to what a great person he was. I was very pleased to have friends of mine come to offer their support. It means so much.
I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around this. People die. They die everyday. They die expectedly after a long illness. They die unexpectedly after an accident or sudden illness. They die old, young, and very young. I live on a farm with animals. If you live you will die. I heard a statistic on the radio show that I was listening to when I was driving to MN for the funeral because I was tired and I wanted to get irked so I would be more alert. "The more you watch TV the more you increase your risk of death." Well at least it served the purpose of making me irked. You can't increase your risk of death. Your risk of death is 100%. No one gets out of here alive. We start dying the moment we are born. etc... My point is intellectually I know we all die. I know my dad is dead. I know he is not coming back. I know it had to happen eventually. I know with his smoking habit he was not likely to be the longest living parent. But I am having such a hard time accepting it.
I've cried. I cried much. I've sobbed and howled. When Spencer & Tin were having a screaming contest on the way home from MN I joined them. (They thought I did ok, but they thought they were both better.) How can someone who is a part of your life just not be there anymore? I answered the phone and knew before Chris told me, he was dead. But even then I asked a question, not a statement. "He's dead?" I saw dad in the casket, it didn't look much like him at all. But it was him, dead. I was a the burial. We tore a ribbon to represent our pain. We lit a candle for him. I know he's dead.
But if I know he's dead, why do I forget. I go along with my life and all of a sudden I get hit with the realization again and again that he's dead. In the bookstore because dad hadn't made it to the bookstore before Christmas for our traditional used bookstore Christmas gift. (Poor woman in the aisle with me.) As I'm starting the truck because I think he could help me fix the starter. In the barn, because he'll think the hay setup I got going is pretty good for a city girl. When I get home and I tell Chris to call his dad. The constant forgetting and remembering is exhausting.
I suppose the forgetting is really denial. And I suppose its a coping mechanism. Helps me get through the day, through life. Things still have to get done even if I just want to go hide under my covers. Chris is gone again. New York this time. While I really wish he were here its probably good he's gone. We are both so on edge and so sensitive. All of our emotions are right at the surface. the distance might help us not lash out at each other, but we also don't get the consoling we both still need. I really feel for my mother-in-law. Now's teh time she could use her husband to help her get through this. She has her daughter and she has her family. But still.... My heart goes out to you Jean.
Anyway - if you see me with red eyes or crying in the beer aisle, I'm not any crazier than usual. I just remembered that dad is dead.
I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around this. People die. They die everyday. They die expectedly after a long illness. They die unexpectedly after an accident or sudden illness. They die old, young, and very young. I live on a farm with animals. If you live you will die. I heard a statistic on the radio show that I was listening to when I was driving to MN for the funeral because I was tired and I wanted to get irked so I would be more alert. "The more you watch TV the more you increase your risk of death." Well at least it served the purpose of making me irked. You can't increase your risk of death. Your risk of death is 100%. No one gets out of here alive. We start dying the moment we are born. etc... My point is intellectually I know we all die. I know my dad is dead. I know he is not coming back. I know it had to happen eventually. I know with his smoking habit he was not likely to be the longest living parent. But I am having such a hard time accepting it.
I've cried. I cried much. I've sobbed and howled. When Spencer & Tin were having a screaming contest on the way home from MN I joined them. (They thought I did ok, but they thought they were both better.) How can someone who is a part of your life just not be there anymore? I answered the phone and knew before Chris told me, he was dead. But even then I asked a question, not a statement. "He's dead?" I saw dad in the casket, it didn't look much like him at all. But it was him, dead. I was a the burial. We tore a ribbon to represent our pain. We lit a candle for him. I know he's dead.
But if I know he's dead, why do I forget. I go along with my life and all of a sudden I get hit with the realization again and again that he's dead. In the bookstore because dad hadn't made it to the bookstore before Christmas for our traditional used bookstore Christmas gift. (Poor woman in the aisle with me.) As I'm starting the truck because I think he could help me fix the starter. In the barn, because he'll think the hay setup I got going is pretty good for a city girl. When I get home and I tell Chris to call his dad. The constant forgetting and remembering is exhausting.
I suppose the forgetting is really denial. And I suppose its a coping mechanism. Helps me get through the day, through life. Things still have to get done even if I just want to go hide under my covers. Chris is gone again. New York this time. While I really wish he were here its probably good he's gone. We are both so on edge and so sensitive. All of our emotions are right at the surface. the distance might help us not lash out at each other, but we also don't get the consoling we both still need. I really feel for my mother-in-law. Now's teh time she could use her husband to help her get through this. She has her daughter and she has her family. But still.... My heart goes out to you Jean.
Anyway - if you see me with red eyes or crying in the beer aisle, I'm not any crazier than usual. I just remembered that dad is dead.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Joy & Pain
On Saturday Jan 23rd we went to "The Flakeout Festival" in the Wisconsin Dells. We went to celebrate Kiki's birthday eve and just enjoy the family being together after Chris' long trip. The Flakeout Festival promised snow sculptures, ice sculptures, a 7ft tall ice maze, a tubing hill and other varied events. When we arrived we were all very much disappointed. This event was not all it was promised, and the rain didn't help what they had. Chris suffering from jet lag, and Colin with his cynical personality and being a teenager were the most obvious with their disappointment. I kept telling them to relax, enjoy, don't make this day worse. So Colin said, "Mom you are disappointed too" "Yes Colin, I am. If they had just stated clearly what they did have instead of blowing it out of proportion we could appreciate for what it was instead of lamenting what it isn't. But I didn't come here for the festival anyway. I came to spend time with you and dad and all of your siblings, having fun not working and worrying about work. I don't care what they do or do not have here I am just here to have fun with you. So would you rather be at home mucking out the barn, which really needs it, or here with all of us?" He smirked and said "yeah, I guess I'd rather be here." And that was it. Kelsy got 1 ear pierced (how else is she going to be different?) They walked through the maze (with only 1 path) about 6 times, saw the snow sculptures, most of them still looked pretty cool, saw the 1 ice sculpture, and went down the very small tubing hill many times. It was perfect for Calli, Spencer & Tin. While we were watching them Colin got bored and started throwing snowballs at Chris. Chris offered Kiki 25 cents amnesty to protect and avenge him. And much avenging happened. Much snow was thrown and whitewashing took place. At one point Kels was on her back and Colin was sitting on her giving her a white wash, Kels grabbed some snow and shoved it in Colin's face and up his nose. She will never be kept down! and the laughing, never has a war been so much fun.
Then we went to the arcade. They played many games. Colin and Kiki played Dance Dance Revolution a few times and even had a crowd gathered watching them and their ponesomeness! Chris & Tin did a ticket winning game and won over 300 tickets with one token. (The gambling addiction begins!) When Spencer was turning in tickets an adult couple came over and asked him if he wanted their 200 tickets. Spencer, Tin & Calli picked out their prizes including 2 things for the Birthday girl. Chris went to get the car, and I went with the Spence, Tin & Calli to tube some more. Through all this Kit was fantastic, and why shouldn't she be? The mama's girl had her mama!
Before we headed home at 8:30pm we had dinner at Famous Dave's. I really need to learn how to make brisket! On the way home we listened to an old favorite that was recently rediscovered, Veggietales! I took a memory snapshot as everyone was singing, no fighting, no complaining, just joy! Perfect moments are few, the car ride home and most of the day was one of them.
Shortly before we arrived home my dear Father-in law was in Minnesota having a heart attack. Chris's dad, Bill and his wife, Jean, were at a movie. He left the movie, came back and said they needed to leave. On the way out he had to stop and sit. He was having a hard time breathing. He tried to go again, he walked a few feet and had to stop again. Jean asked if she should call 911. He let her know she should. when she went to the counter to ask them to call Bill had fallen to the ground. The emt arrived immediately . While trying to help him Bill said he had had pains about 1 month ago, which Jean knew about, but at the time neither associated with a heart attack, and again 3 days ago, which Jean did not know about. Bill had not gone to the Dr because they did not have health insurance and a DR visit is too expensive, as we all know. Bill was rushed to the hospital where he quickly flatlined. The drs did everything they could to revive him. But there was nothing. My dear father-in-law, the only man I called "dad", a friend and father to my husband, storyteller, lap holder, and grandfather to my children was dead at 64.
We got the call at 2am. Needless to say Chris & I didn't sleep anymore that night. On top of it all he died at 12:30am, which means he died on Kiki's birthday. As it goes almost everyone in our family who has died in the past 15 years has died in January with very few exceptions. Jean told us we did not need to tell Kiki. But we knew we could not hide this from her. Chris & I would be fine and then out of the blue we would tear up or start sobbing. Our kids are very astute. They would wonder why we had red eyes, why we were crying, what was going on. We told Colin and Calli first as they were up first and it allowed us each to hug a kid. They were predictably devastated. Calli told us not to tell Kiki. For all the reasons as before, we told her. She too was devastated. Later I told her I hoped we made the right decision to tell her. Everyone wanted to protect her and everyone wanted her to have a happy birthday, not the worst birthday ever. She said she wished Grandpa hadn't died, but she would have been mad at me for lying to her. We all wish grandpa hadn't died.
Chris is glad that his dad went quickly without too much pain. But he regrets not having his goodbyes. I asked him what would've been said that hasn't already been said? Chris & his dad talked alot. Bill came to the farm about every other month, and we spoke on the phone about every week, not to mention e-mails & facebook. Bill loved us. He loved Chris & was so proud of what he has done. He loved me and would often comment on how amazed he was on everything I was able to accomplish, although he did admonish me about leaving my snowblower out overnight one time. He was a fantastic grandfather to all of his grandkids who loved him so much. It was always a holiday when grandpa came. He loved his wife. He adored his daughter and his son-in-law. How many parents do you know that love their spouse's mates like their own? He did.
I'm going to miss Bill so much. We all will. I'm going to miss talking to him on the phone or by facebook, always "liking" everything and inquiring about our awol dog Indy. I'm going to miss his visits. I'm going to miss him getting up early in the morning, making a mess with the coffee and heading outdoors to have a smoke and look in on the farm. I'm going to miss him relaxing and reading while Chris & I are working, and coming around after the work is done and asking if we need help. I'm going to miss him bringing beer when he comes, even if it is some god-awful pisswater. I'm going to miss not being able to call him for advice. I'm going to miss his hugs and kisses. I miss him.
If anyone knows the tale of Indy then you know that he does not let us touch him. He's been getting closer over the past few months, and he's gotten close enough to almost touch. Bill always was wondering how Indy was doing and if we had made any progress with him. The morning of Bill's death I went to do animal chores, animals wait for no one or no death. As I walked out all the dogs, including Indy came up to me for a morning greeting, as is normal. As I walked away Indy came up and nudged my hand. He backed up pretty quickly, but it does not change that for the first time this dog intentionally touched me.
I can't help but think that it had something to do with dad. I hope it means he's alright. He's with his mom and having a beer with his brother. Meeting his dad. Reading a good book. He deserves the good life. I love you dad. We all love you! We all miss you! Give everyone hugs for me. I'll hug everyone here for you.
Then we went to the arcade. They played many games. Colin and Kiki played Dance Dance Revolution a few times and even had a crowd gathered watching them and their ponesomeness! Chris & Tin did a ticket winning game and won over 300 tickets with one token. (The gambling addiction begins!) When Spencer was turning in tickets an adult couple came over and asked him if he wanted their 200 tickets. Spencer, Tin & Calli picked out their prizes including 2 things for the Birthday girl. Chris went to get the car, and I went with the Spence, Tin & Calli to tube some more. Through all this Kit was fantastic, and why shouldn't she be? The mama's girl had her mama!
Before we headed home at 8:30pm we had dinner at Famous Dave's. I really need to learn how to make brisket! On the way home we listened to an old favorite that was recently rediscovered, Veggietales! I took a memory snapshot as everyone was singing, no fighting, no complaining, just joy! Perfect moments are few, the car ride home and most of the day was one of them.
Shortly before we arrived home my dear Father-in law was in Minnesota having a heart attack. Chris's dad, Bill and his wife, Jean, were at a movie. He left the movie, came back and said they needed to leave. On the way out he had to stop and sit. He was having a hard time breathing. He tried to go again, he walked a few feet and had to stop again. Jean asked if she should call 911. He let her know she should. when she went to the counter to ask them to call Bill had fallen to the ground. The emt arrived immediately . While trying to help him Bill said he had had pains about 1 month ago, which Jean knew about, but at the time neither associated with a heart attack, and again 3 days ago, which Jean did not know about. Bill had not gone to the Dr because they did not have health insurance and a DR visit is too expensive, as we all know. Bill was rushed to the hospital where he quickly flatlined. The drs did everything they could to revive him. But there was nothing. My dear father-in-law, the only man I called "dad", a friend and father to my husband, storyteller, lap holder, and grandfather to my children was dead at 64.
We got the call at 2am. Needless to say Chris & I didn't sleep anymore that night. On top of it all he died at 12:30am, which means he died on Kiki's birthday. As it goes almost everyone in our family who has died in the past 15 years has died in January with very few exceptions. Jean told us we did not need to tell Kiki. But we knew we could not hide this from her. Chris & I would be fine and then out of the blue we would tear up or start sobbing. Our kids are very astute. They would wonder why we had red eyes, why we were crying, what was going on. We told Colin and Calli first as they were up first and it allowed us each to hug a kid. They were predictably devastated. Calli told us not to tell Kiki. For all the reasons as before, we told her. She too was devastated. Later I told her I hoped we made the right decision to tell her. Everyone wanted to protect her and everyone wanted her to have a happy birthday, not the worst birthday ever. She said she wished Grandpa hadn't died, but she would have been mad at me for lying to her. We all wish grandpa hadn't died.
If anyone knows the tale of Indy then you know that he does not let us touch him. He's been getting closer over the past few months, and he's gotten close enough to almost touch. Bill always was wondering how Indy was doing and if we had made any progress with him. The morning of Bill's death I went to do animal chores, animals wait for no one or no death. As I walked out all the dogs, including Indy came up to me for a morning greeting, as is normal. As I walked away Indy came up and nudged my hand. He backed up pretty quickly, but it does not change that for the first time this dog intentionally touched me.
I can't help but think that it had something to do with dad. I hope it means he's alright. He's with his mom and having a beer with his brother. Meeting his dad. Reading a good book. He deserves the good life. I love you dad. We all love you! We all miss you! Give everyone hugs for me. I'll hug everyone here for you.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
The Day that Colin Lived.
January 12, 1996 is the day that Colin lived. 12 Days before Kelsy was born. 2 months before Colin turned 2. On that day I was hugely pregnant. Chris had finished school for the day and was at his night job. I had finished work and picked up Colin from his grandmother's. Colin & I went to our small apartment in Cottage Grove MN. We had recently moved out of my mom's house and it was nice to be more independent again. I started making supper for us. Spaghetti. Colin started roaming through the house, and as was his favorite activity at the time he was trying to put things in the electrical outlets. The covers did no good, he just pulled them out. So I decided to redirect him.
He stood on a stool handing me spaghetti noodles to put in the pot. My normal way of doing things was always cooking on the back burners, but at this point I was so huge I was using the front burner. Then the cat came running through our kitchen followed by the dog, who knocked Colin off his stool. He reached out to stop from falling. While reaching out he pulled the pot of scalding water down on himself. I immediately grabbed him and put him in the shower under cold water. Then I took off his wet clothes wrapped him in a blanket and drove him to the hospital. I should have called 911, but then again I probably would have gone insane waiting. We arrived at the hospital. At some point I let my mom know who called my aunt who went to Chris's work to tell him. They started treatment of Colin immediately and prepped him for ambulance transport to another hospital, called Ramsey at the time, now Regions. We were fortunate enough to have one of the best burn units in the region right under our nose.
When we arrived they began further treatment of Colin. Then Chris arrived,and for the first time I cried. I cried because my stupidity caused pain to my perfect little child. I should have cooked on the back burner. He should have been on a sturdier stool. We should have had sandwiches. Why did he have to suffer for my mistake? Even now I wish I could take that pain from him. Still my heart breaks. I cry thinking about it. I had utterly failed Colin and Chris. Colin had 3rd degree burns on 20% of his little body. The right side of his face and right side of his back, a little bit of his chest and his right arm.
He was in the burn unit for 1 week. He regressed on speech and using the toilet. He also gained 7 pounds and threw-up on me everyday. I still gag at the smell of pediasure. It was extremely critical that they kept his nutrition up. Without skin a person has lost their primary form of disease prevention. Some of the nurses became annoyed with us. We would not leave Colin's side. And to make it worse both Chris & I spent the night. One night Colin started running a fever, a nurse came in to take blood. The 3rd time she poked Colin with the needle because she could not find a vein Chris told her she had one more chance and then she needed to call a pediatric nurse. She was angry and started telling us why she needed the blood. We knew why and agreed blood needed to be taken, but clearly it needed to be someone who could find the little veins of a not yet 2 year old. I was so proud of Chris. The fever was gone that morning.
Some nurses were thrilled we spent so much time there. Some for obvious reasons, we changed his diaper (had to weigh and record it), we put in new movies for him, we helped him not be so bored. We parented our son. Some were happy because they didn't see enough parental involvement with other children, it depressed the nurses and the children. It especially made them happy that Chris was involved. One nurse made a point of telling Chris to ignore the other nurses. He said the best thing we can do for our child is to be there. That nurse was right.
Colin was the least injured person there. And he was nearly 2. So he had a little more energy than the others. We would take him for walks around the ward with his nose tube and IV tube in tow. We'd race his cars down the ramp, he'd point out trash and dust that was being left behind that Chris & I had to pick up. When we'd go by other patient's rooms some of them would invite us in. It made them happy to see a friendly little guy, and made their injuries seem a little less bad. If this little person could get through this, so could they. One of the patients was another little boy that had just turned 2 and was burned from the waist down on Christmas because the bathwater was too hot. Colin was able to get that little boy to talk and play again. Colin made a difference not only the week he was there but the numerous weeks he had to come back for his daily bath. The people who wanted to talk to him, the parents that wanted to commiserate with us. And eventually the little baby Kelsy that would accompany us. A baby brightens everybody's day because a baby reminds us of new life and hope.
If one is to get burned it is best if you are a 2 year old boy. For whatever reason males heal better from burns. And young people are in an active growth phase and also heal quickly from burns. He was also fortunate the water was water not soup or oil, much cleaner. and we were close to the shower to stop the heat. Colin's rate of healing absolutely astounded the Drs. At first it was a no-brainer that he should have skin grafting. By the end of the week it wasn't so clear cut. His rate of healing surpassed everyone's most optimistic expectations. By the end of the week the burns on his face were more like a bad sunburn. His chest and back were healing beautifully. The biggest concern was his arm, and at this point the Drs could not guess how completely he would or would not heal.
In the end we decided against the grafting. A week at the hospital with Colin, followed by Kelsy coming a few days later, we could not stomach another week in the hospital and inflicting more pain on Colin for the grafting without a clear idea that this was going to be beneficial. I think it was the right choice. Colin has one spot around his arm where there is very clear scarring. The Drs believe the scarring is at that specific point and not so much elsewhere because he was put under the cold water so quickly and his shirt bunched there holding in the heat. If you look closely you'll see the pores on his back and chest are larger. Unless he's shirtless you would never know he was burned.
I've asked Colin if he remembers. He says not really, getting knocked off the stool and then mostly just the baths at the hospital. The nurses chasing him. I'm glad he doesn't remember. I remember enough for the both of us. And everyday, even when he drives me nuts, I am thankful for him. I realize even when I was a child the medicine didn't exist to keep him alive. And I'll take my young man driving me nuts anyday rather than the alternative. I love you Colin!
Promises Promises....
The 10 day forecast looks SWEET - although that 1st day of the warming trend keeps being put off. Originally it was Saturday now its at Wednesday. In any case its at or above freezing for the next 10 days. As long as it gets cold again gradually I am excited for our January thaw.
Our little Kierstyn is a very stereotypical girl baby. Much more engaged socially and verbally. She tries to mimic our faces, laughs at raised eyebrows, bemused when someone wears a hat. She is working on her mouth muscles so much more than any of our other children. She raspberries with and without the tongue, she makes kissing sounds, she puts different affectations in her laughs from a big old gurgly baby belly laugh to a simple "ha-ha" Nelson laugh.. She is a communicator. A few days ago she started saying ma-ma. Last night she looked straight at me during dinner and said mama. All the kids were in an uproar. We had all heard her say mama before, but in our opinion she meant it for the first time.
Its so bittersweet to see babies progress, especially the last one, but talking is all sweet. Its so satisfying for everyone to know what is wanted. There are so many fewer tears when a child can communicate its needs. So many toddler & preschool temper tantrums stem from the simple issue of the child not being able to communicate with others. Its very frustrating. So I am excited that it seems as if Kierstyn might be an early talker. Early talker does not mean talkative. Our earliest talker is our least talkative child. Not that she isn't a great communicator, she just doesn't want to waste her allotted words needlessly.
The other thing that was crystal clear to me last night was how much everyone adores Kierstyn. Every child in this house loves her. I think it can be frustrating to the younger children who do not get to hold her as much and don't always play with her as gently as they should, and so they get reprimanded or criticized. I'm sure she is seen sometimes as the baby that took their mama's attention away. I've been encouraging both the younger boys to come do animal chores with me so we can have some alone time. Of course who would want to work with mom in the cold - blechh. Tin insists that I brush his teeth, and he must lay on my lap so Kit has to go elsewhere. I think he finds a lot of power in that, and his place has not been usurped.
I think the bigger issue is with my older boy nearly 7 1/2 and leaving little boyhood to big boyhood. And my eldest joins him as he leaves boyhood and enters manhood. Its a struggle to move on. To take on bigger responsibilities and more independence and theoretically more freedom. For Spencer its a little more clear cut - if he wants the later bedtime he has to do "big boy" chores. More work = later bedtime. Be there when I need you mom, but get out of the way when I don't. Don't interfere unless I ned you to, and yes mom it is up to you to figure out when that is. That's all of parenthood really. Knowing when to take their hand, and when to watch and cheer, and when to just be quiet and offer your shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen, with those few moments when everything is just right. And with 6 children not everyone has ever been content all at the same time. But there is solace in that, "we got through it with her we can get through it with him" or " he's doing ok, surely we are doing something right." Sometimes I so badly want to just hug them and keep them with me forever, and other times I wonder why I chose to spend so much time with my children. And then I look at them and I see what amazing people they are and it is such a treat to be part of their lives. Its getting through those trials that make us all stonger and usually strengthens that bond we have. And then the reward after all the struggles of the transition. It is so bittersweet to see our babies progress.
Our little Kierstyn is a very stereotypical girl baby. Much more engaged socially and verbally. She tries to mimic our faces, laughs at raised eyebrows, bemused when someone wears a hat. She is working on her mouth muscles so much more than any of our other children. She raspberries with and without the tongue, she makes kissing sounds, she puts different affectations in her laughs from a big old gurgly baby belly laugh to a simple "ha-ha" Nelson laugh.. She is a communicator. A few days ago she started saying ma-ma. Last night she looked straight at me during dinner and said mama. All the kids were in an uproar. We had all heard her say mama before, but in our opinion she meant it for the first time.
Its so bittersweet to see babies progress, especially the last one, but talking is all sweet. Its so satisfying for everyone to know what is wanted. There are so many fewer tears when a child can communicate its needs. So many toddler & preschool temper tantrums stem from the simple issue of the child not being able to communicate with others. Its very frustrating. So I am excited that it seems as if Kierstyn might be an early talker. Early talker does not mean talkative. Our earliest talker is our least talkative child. Not that she isn't a great communicator, she just doesn't want to waste her allotted words needlessly.
The other thing that was crystal clear to me last night was how much everyone adores Kierstyn. Every child in this house loves her. I think it can be frustrating to the younger children who do not get to hold her as much and don't always play with her as gently as they should, and so they get reprimanded or criticized. I'm sure she is seen sometimes as the baby that took their mama's attention away. I've been encouraging both the younger boys to come do animal chores with me so we can have some alone time. Of course who would want to work with mom in the cold - blechh. Tin insists that I brush his teeth, and he must lay on my lap so Kit has to go elsewhere. I think he finds a lot of power in that, and his place has not been usurped.
I think the bigger issue is with my older boy nearly 7 1/2 and leaving little boyhood to big boyhood. And my eldest joins him as he leaves boyhood and enters manhood. Its a struggle to move on. To take on bigger responsibilities and more independence and theoretically more freedom. For Spencer its a little more clear cut - if he wants the later bedtime he has to do "big boy" chores. More work = later bedtime. Be there when I need you mom, but get out of the way when I don't. Don't interfere unless I ned you to, and yes mom it is up to you to figure out when that is. That's all of parenthood really. Knowing when to take their hand, and when to watch and cheer, and when to just be quiet and offer your shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen, with those few moments when everything is just right. And with 6 children not everyone has ever been content all at the same time. But there is solace in that, "we got through it with her we can get through it with him" or " he's doing ok, surely we are doing something right." Sometimes I so badly want to just hug them and keep them with me forever, and other times I wonder why I chose to spend so much time with my children. And then I look at them and I see what amazing people they are and it is such a treat to be part of their lives. Its getting through those trials that make us all stonger and usually strengthens that bond we have. And then the reward after all the struggles of the transition. It is so bittersweet to see our babies progress.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Glad to be living South
Sorry friends and family in Minnesota, but I'm really glad we don't live there anymore right now. I'm really glad -10 is really really cold here, and that's as cold as it got. I'm so glad to live in a state that doesn't set the nation's cold temps. Granted Northern WI does get very cold, but its Int'l Falls MN that makes the news for the nation's cold temps. Besides, we live in SOUTHERN WI., practically in IL. Not to say that -10 isn't cold, but its not -30. It hasn't been so cold we couldn't dress for the weather and at least go for a walk. That makes me happy and helps in the sanity department.
Chris was in Atlanta last week. They got snow while he was there and temps don to 25. The funny part was residents were told to stay home, not specifically because of the snow, which makes sense because they aren't used to driving in the snow. No, they were told to stay off the roads because it was so cold the salt wasn't working. Pardon me???? What special southern salt are they using that doesn't work at 25 degrees? If it got any warmer the salt would be rather obsolete. Funny the regional differences.
Chris has arrived safe & sound in Hong Kong. He'll be home in 10 short days. We'll be thrilled to have him back. If nothing else just to check in that its my teenagers not me. :) Actually the kids are usually great. Very helpful and not much backtalk. Unfortunately yesterday was a pretty whiny day. Too much TV for sure! And Tintin got his first ear infection. It must have been ready to burst because he was in pain. I feel fortunate though. Both Colin & Calli were plagued with ear infections as youngsters. Poor Calli had 18 ear infections by the time she was 18 months. And Colin had ear infections so often that would not clear up we decided to have tubes inserted in his ears. So I am pleased that this was Tin's first. Anyway whiny kids. I said "I'm throwing all but 2 of you in a snowbank you are being so whiny." Oblivious Colin says "which 2 are you keeping?" Kelsy, in typical Kelsy form and demeanor says, "Kit and me obviously." And she was absolutely correct.
Speaking of silly Kiki. She and some friends are working on a band. I asked her what her part was in the band. She said probably playing piano. Its funny because she fought me tooth & nail on taking piano lessons, and she's the only that still plays and has even been giving Spencer lessons. Oh irony! Of course I will not be pointing this out to her.
Animals are faring pretty well. We have one steer that is fighting pink eye & pneumonia. I think I have him on the mend but he just isn't moving. So twice a day I feed & water him where he's at, with the philosophy that if he's eating he's living - rather simplistic and obvious I know, but very true. I hope I can keep him going long enough to fight this infection. Unfortunately he's too big for me to just pick up to his feet, so I'll just keep doing for him the best I can.
Chickens are doing well. Still laying eggs. Something has burrowed its way in from outside the coop to the chick brooding area. It doesn't seem to be killing anything, but still it concerns me. Not many digging animals out here that wouldn't eat a chicken. I keep collapsing the tunnel and try to block the holes its created, but so far its has managed to re-dig. Our pigeons have laid 2 eggs, and they are sitting on them. Its very neat to see both mom & dad take turns. Maybe we'll have some success with them.
No goat kids yet, but the goats are staying in their pens. That in itself is quite an accomplishment. Next week should be warm enough that I can get some more pens built. That would be something to have it done before Chris gets home. I'd love to just spend time with him for the week he is home.
Chris was in Atlanta last week. They got snow while he was there and temps don to 25. The funny part was residents were told to stay home, not specifically because of the snow, which makes sense because they aren't used to driving in the snow. No, they were told to stay off the roads because it was so cold the salt wasn't working. Pardon me???? What special southern salt are they using that doesn't work at 25 degrees? If it got any warmer the salt would be rather obsolete. Funny the regional differences.
Chris has arrived safe & sound in Hong Kong. He'll be home in 10 short days. We'll be thrilled to have him back. If nothing else just to check in that its my teenagers not me. :) Actually the kids are usually great. Very helpful and not much backtalk. Unfortunately yesterday was a pretty whiny day. Too much TV for sure! And Tintin got his first ear infection. It must have been ready to burst because he was in pain. I feel fortunate though. Both Colin & Calli were plagued with ear infections as youngsters. Poor Calli had 18 ear infections by the time she was 18 months. And Colin had ear infections so often that would not clear up we decided to have tubes inserted in his ears. So I am pleased that this was Tin's first. Anyway whiny kids. I said "I'm throwing all but 2 of you in a snowbank you are being so whiny." Oblivious Colin says "which 2 are you keeping?" Kelsy, in typical Kelsy form and demeanor says, "Kit and me obviously." And she was absolutely correct.
Speaking of silly Kiki. She and some friends are working on a band. I asked her what her part was in the band. She said probably playing piano. Its funny because she fought me tooth & nail on taking piano lessons, and she's the only that still plays and has even been giving Spencer lessons. Oh irony! Of course I will not be pointing this out to her.
Animals are faring pretty well. We have one steer that is fighting pink eye & pneumonia. I think I have him on the mend but he just isn't moving. So twice a day I feed & water him where he's at, with the philosophy that if he's eating he's living - rather simplistic and obvious I know, but very true. I hope I can keep him going long enough to fight this infection. Unfortunately he's too big for me to just pick up to his feet, so I'll just keep doing for him the best I can.
Chickens are doing well. Still laying eggs. Something has burrowed its way in from outside the coop to the chick brooding area. It doesn't seem to be killing anything, but still it concerns me. Not many digging animals out here that wouldn't eat a chicken. I keep collapsing the tunnel and try to block the holes its created, but so far its has managed to re-dig. Our pigeons have laid 2 eggs, and they are sitting on them. Its very neat to see both mom & dad take turns. Maybe we'll have some success with them.
No goat kids yet, but the goats are staying in their pens. That in itself is quite an accomplishment. Next week should be warm enough that I can get some more pens built. That would be something to have it done before Chris gets home. I'd love to just spend time with him for the week he is home.
Friday, January 1, 2010
Happy New Year & Happy 6 month Birthday Kit!
We had a good Christmas. I have some pictures here. http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2048577&id=1363934017&l=cd6069e97d You can look at them even if you aren't on Facebook.
I haven't posted much. Been super busy. Nothing exciting, just time consuming. I've been up early every morning checking on goats who are getting close to kidding ( having babies.) 4 of our 6 does are showing signs of closeness. I worry they'll have the babies in the early morning and mom will be stupid & the kid will freeze. I'm working on putting up pens or stalls in the barn so they will have an extra protected space to have the kids, but its slow going. I have 4 pens done now. (And 4 goats in the pens.) I need to have 13 done by March for the sheep. the barn has become a dumping ground for misc stuff since we don't really use it in the summer, as well as I pretty much let things go the last few months of my pregnancy and the first few months of Kit's life. Now its catch up time, so its clearing out clutter as well as building. Kelsy has helped me a lot out there.
Another early morning check is the chickens. Our electricity to the coop isn't so hot and circuits flip all the time. We have chicks that still need that extra heat, so I always check them first thing thing in the morning and last thing at night.
Chris and the other kids have been working hard on cleaning out the basement. We haven't completely unpacked since we moved in. And we did not realize how wet the basement was. So many things we thought were protected in Rubbermaid bins were not. We had kept the local newspaper from the day each child was born, and unfortunately the newspapers for the 4 oldest are not salvageable. But we have recovered many things that we were missing, so its an extra special Christmas!
One bittersweet event was the butchering of our sows. It needed to happen as the cost of feed far outweighed the money they brought in. Still we knew them and had grown attached to some extent. This will free us up considerably. Perhaps we will be able to get away for a short while. It would be very nice to visit family and maybe even take a vacation - gasp!
Joining Tin in the haircutting department, everyone got a a haircut but Spencer. Kelsy even got her hair dyed as an early birthday present. And Colin & Calli got ears pierced, Calli was first though! and Colin only had 1 done.
Since this is New Year's Day I suppose goals & resolutions are in order. We are working (and will continue to work) on decluttering and getting rid of extra items that get in our way and do not give something back. Whether this be extra toys, clothes, animals, activities or pounds. If they do not enhance our quality of life we need to eliminate them. That is our objective, I think we have a good start on it.
Cheers to a bountiful 2010!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)